


Domesticity

by regionalatbest



Category: Amazingphil - Fandom, Danisnotonfire - Fandom, Video Blogging & YouTube RPF
Genre: M/M, Phan - Freeform, YouTube, phanfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-09
Updated: 2013-08-09
Packaged: 2017-12-22 23:21:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,940
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/919233
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/regionalatbest/pseuds/regionalatbest
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dan and Phil can be very domestic</p>
            </blockquote>





	Domesticity

Cleaning

“Dan we have people coming over in an hour, you said you were going to clean this room, why is it still a mess?” Phil asked upon entering the lounge, where he found Dan sitting on his laptop in the exact same position he left him in an hour ago.

“Wait you said two hours a minute ago.”

“Dan, that was an hour ago, please tell me you have at least done something since I left you.”

 “Shit it’s been an hour?” Dan looked at the time on his computer, “fuck it has, okay okay I’ll get to cleaning now, you go take care of the kitchen or something.” He said as he closed his computer and started picking up the various objects that were strewn across the room.

Phil sighed, “I already have, I’ll just help your out and then we can get to getting ready.”

“No no, I said I would do this and I will, go get ready I’ll handle this all by myself.” Dan said as he walked up and kissed Phil on the cheek and then shooed him away to go get dressed.

“You sure?”

“Yes, now go.” Dan said more or less pushing Phil out of the room.

And sure enough when Phil came back the room was perfectly clean and Dan was in his room getting ready. He sat down and got his laptop just as Dan walked into the lounge.

“Whoa, don’t you look nice.” Phil commented, looking up from his screen.

“I was just about to say that about you, good on me for snagging such a nice looking boyfriend.” Dan said sitting down next to Phil just as the doorbell rang, signaling that their guests were there. Dan groaned, “why do they have to be here now?”

“Because this is the time we told them to get here and some of our friends are actually punctual.” Phil said kissing the top of Dan’s head and getting up to get the door.

–––––––––––––––

Sleeping

Phil woke up to the sound of the siren going past the window and the acute sense that the sun was far too high in the sky, meaning they had slept in far too late. He craned his neck to look at the clock and saw that his suspicions were correct, it was 3pm and they really should get up now. He looked down at Dan–who was still asleep–and thought about what the best way to wake him up would be. He knew that waking Dan up in general was always a terrible idea because he was always grouchy no matter what reason Phil had for doing so, but it was getting late and he knew that Dan really did have a video to film. It was just that Dan looked so sweet and innocent and peaceful and it really made Phil have second thoughts about what he was about to do, but he reached and started to kiss Dan until he felt him start to respond. Phil pulled away and looked at Dan as he opened his eyes and then closed them again when he noticed how bright it was outside, snuggling back into Phil’s chest and groaning.

“Good morning sleepy head.”

“Wha’ time ’s it?” Dan asked.

“Three, we slept in late.”

“‘s still too early, five more minutes.”

Phil chuckled, “no love, you have a video to film, remember? What time did you go to bed last night? You were still up when I went to sleep.” he questioned.

“I dunno, seven I think, took a long time to clean.”

“Dan did you clean up the whole party?”

“Yeah, didn’ want you to have to worry ‘bout it.”

“I love you so much you know that?”

“You better.” Dan replied

“But you still have a video to film so we should probably get up now.” Phil said, making to get up and pull off the covers when he felt Dan wrap his arms around his torso tighter.

“Nooo, five more minutes.”

“Dan you’ve already had five more minutes, it’s time to get up and start the day.”

“Don’t wanna.” Dan said scrunching his eyes close and tightening his arms around Phil.

“Well, either way I have to get up and get started with my day.”

“Noooo stay here, you’re warm.”

“Dan I have stuff to do and I really should get up.”

“If you stay with me for ‘nother half hour I’ll give you a blow job.”

Phil sighed and got back into bed, “I hate you.”

“That’s okay.” Dan said and he snuggled back into Phil with a smirk on his lips.

–––––––––––––––

Dying Hair

“You need to get your hair dyed again, I can see your roots.” Dan said looking down at Phil, who was perched up against his side on Tumblr.

“I know,” Phil sighed, “I was thinking of just going to the drug store and getting some and doing it myself.”

“Phil we have that Radio 1 shoot tomorrow, that’s a terrible idea. What if you mess it up and you end up making your hair look like shit?”

“Then I’ll make an early appointment with Fabrice for tomorrow before we have to go in.”

“The shoot’s at noon, you won’t have time, but if you want to do it yourself feel free, just don’t get mad at me when I say I told you so if it turns out poorly.”

“Fine,” Phil said closing his laptop and making way to get up, “I’m going to SuperDrug, I’ll be back soon.”

“I’ll be here.” Dan called from the couch.

Phil went to the drug store and after much deliberation because Jesus Christ there were a lot of different kinds of black, he found one that he liked and bought it and then headed home, swinging the bag as he went.

“I’m baaack,” Phil said walking in the door and coming into the lounge to find Dan in the exact same position that he left him in, “I see you got a lot done when I was gone.” 

“You were gone for eight seconds, what did you expect me to do?”

“Nothing really, you’re just in the exact same position that I left you in.” Phil said plopping himself down next to Dan.

“So what kind did you get?”

“Just this one, it’s called Jet Black so it seemed like it will do the job.” Phil said getting the hair dye out of the bag and showing it to Dan. “So, do you want to help me do it?”

“Dye your hair? No no no, this is your thing, I’m not going to be held responsible for your hair looking like shit.”

“C’mon it can’t be that hard, and I know you’ve done it before.”

“Phil my fringe turned out pink, you really think that I should help you?” Dan questioned.

“Hush, that was years ago, I’m sure you’re much better now.”

“Fine, go get the stuff ready and call me over when I’m needed.” Dan said turning his attention away from Phil and back to his laptop.

––

“So I’m just supposed to put this on your head?” Dan asked after Phil explained exactly what he would need to do to dye Phil’s hair. They were in the bathroom and Phil had already changed his shirt and got all the stuff ready and was now more or less straddling the toilet waiting for Dan to start. 

“Yes, but make sure you get all of my hair so that there’s no weird patches of slightly less black hair.”

“Okay got it,” Dan said picking up the dye and the brush that came with, “though, the dye isn’t really all that black, you sure you got the right color. I feel like this will dye your hair brown.”

“Yes, I made sure that’s black, now get to it.”

“Okay okay, though I still don’t know why you had to wear a shirt, I’m just gonna end up getting dye on it and then you’ll never be able to wear it out in public again.”

“Because I don’t want you to get dye on my back, besides, this shirt is old and ratty, I’m not planning to wear it out in public.” Phil explained.

“Okay fine, just stay still while I do this okay?” Dan said as he started to apply the dye, it took far longer than he expected–which is probably because he really didn’t want to mess up and have it look bad–but eventually they were done. “Okay so according to the instructions you have to leave the dye in your hair for a half hour then rinse it off, so just like don’t touch anything, got it?”

“Yes Dan, though it’s really hard to not get the hair dye on other stuff, do you think you can go get me my DS, I want to play Animal Crossing.” Phil asked sweetly.

"Fine," Dan said, putting down the brush and heading downstairs to retrieve Phil's game, returning to the room with a smirk. “Jesus Christ Phil why do you have dye on your hands?” Dan asked upon entering the bathroom. “Didn’t I say that you can’t touch anything?”

“Yeah, but I had an itch and it itched really bad so I had to scratch it, but it’s fine I’ll just wash it off.” Phil said, reaching for the sink.

“No wait, I don’t want you getting dye on anything else, I’ll turn it on for you.” Dan said reaching for the tap and turning it on. “You really are just an accident waiting to happen aren’t you?” Dan said smiling.

“It’s amazing that I didn’t die when I was living on my own huh?”

“Please, I spent more time there than not, you hardly lived on your own.”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right. Hey how much longer before I can rinse this out?” Phil asked.

“I don’t know, you were supposed to keep track, didn’t you set a timer on your phone?” Dan questioned

“No, I thought you were going to.”

“Phil why would I set a timer for your hair?”

“I don’t know, shit how long do you think it’s been?”

“Probably about twenty minutes, you should probably get in the shower now.”

“Okay, dear God I hope this doesn’t end up looking bad.” Phil said as he turned on the shower and started to get undressed.

“You were the one that wanted to do it at home.” Dan stated as he left the room.

–––––––––––––––

Baking

“Daaaan?” Phil asked walking into the office where Dan was editing his new video.

“Whaaaat?” Dan replied mimicking Phil.

“Why don’t we have any food?”

“What are you talking about? We just got Tescos a few days ago.” Dan said not looking away from the computer.

“Yeah but none of it’s any good, I want something sweet.”

“Well we bought maltesers, have some of those.”

“They don’t sound good, I want like cookies or something.” Phil said sighing.

“Then make some.” Dan said finally leaning back and looking at Phil.

“But we don’t have any recipes.”

“Then come here, we’ll look one up.” Dan said, motioning for Phil to come to the computer. 

Phil walked over and joined Dan in the chair. “You’re just trying to get out of editing.”

“True, but when am I not? What kind of cookies did you have in mind?”

“I don’t know, just like look up sugar cookies, like the ones that we made for the video.”

“Very specific, okay lets see.” Dan said as he typed in sugar cookie recipe into Google and got millions of results in return. “This one seems good–nice and simple–here, I’ll email it to you and then you can go make sure we have everything that’s needed.”

“Okay.” Phil replied quickly pecking Dan on the cheek and getting up to go downstairs to make sure he wouldn’t have to make a run to the shop. They, surprisingly, had everything they needed and Phil got to work.

It really wasn’t all that hard to do and he liked baking so it was really quite enjoyable for him. Eventually he heard the sound of Dan coming down the stairs from the office and into the kitchen to help Phil. He walked up behind him and snaked his arms around Phil, “So, how’s it going?” Dan asked, resting his head on Phil’s shoulder.

“Pretty good, we had everything and I’m about to put the first batch in the oven. You finish editing your video?”

“Mhm,” Dan hummed into Phil’s neck “just waiting for it to upload now.”

“Surprisingly early for you isn’t it?”

“It is, hope the fans don’t expect me to make a habit of it.”

“They probably know you better than that by now.” Phil replied, taking a step backwards as he nudged Dan off so that he could open the oven and put the cookies inside. “There we go, now to just remember to set the timer and we’re good to do whatever for the next eight to ten minutes.”

“Well it usually takes you about half that time so...”

“Oh shut up,” Phil said lightly punching Dan, “you know that’s not what I had in mind.”

“Yeah, but it’s what I had in mind.”

“Don’t you have some fans to keep under control and theories to shoot down?”

“Eh they’ll be fine.”

“Dan?”

“Mmm?” Dan hummed.

“We’re not having sex in the kitchen.”

“Why not?”

“Because it’s disgusting and unsanitary and the cookies are going to burn if we do and I don’t really want to right now.”

“You’re no fun.” Dan said pulling away and pouting.

“I’ll remember that tonight.” Phil said just as the timer beeped and he made to open the oven and get the cookies out. “Hey look I didn’t burn them.”

“And they look delicious.” Dan said reaching over to the tray and taking one, “shit fuck hot hot hot.” he said spitting the cookie out into the sink.

“God you’re attractive.”

“Shut up it was really hot.” Dan said getting a cup of water in an effort to cool down his mouth

“What did you expect, I just pulled them out of the oven.” Phil said laughing.

“I hate you.” Dan said glaring, but Phil could tell that there was no malice behind it.

–––––––––––––––

Yelling

Their downstairs neighbor was someone that they would never have chosen to live by. He was loud and didn’t understand that some people liked to sleep later than 8am and that it’s really quite nice to give the people above you some warning before you start using a sledgehammer on their floor. But this had been the final straw. Sometime last night Dan and Phil had heard the very loud noise of his car alarm going off and it didn’t stop. All night long. No matter what either of them did they couldn’t block out the noise so neither of them had got very much sleep at all the night before, leaving them both grumpy and very short-tempered. Phil knew right then and there that they would have to get back at him someway. He mentioned this to Dan because while they were both shit at pranks Dan was still better than him and he wanted to make this good. The both spent all day thinking about it, trying to come up with the best idea that would be the least destructive and cost the least amount of money. They decided on megaphones. Phil went out one day after the radio show and bought them, making sure they worked and then they waited. They waited until it was late enough that he was probably asleep (and maybe had a drink or two in the mean time) and then they went into Dan’s room–which was directly above his room–and they yelled.

“Hey Buddy, you think it’s fun using your fucking sledge hammer at 7am? Well fuck you!” Dan yelled. “Fuck you and you’re stupid sledge hammer that has woken us up every morning this week and your stupid thin floors–”

“And-and your stupid car that never shuts up and keeps us up all night!” Phil interjected.

“Yeah! And why must you have sex so early? And why do you have’ta be so loud? Can’t you wait until like ten or something?” Dan shouted at the floor.

“Well to be fair we can be kind of loud some times.” Phil mentioned

“Yeah but we do it at a normal time.”

“Oh yeah,” Phil said to Dan before going back to yelling at their neighbor, “see, we’re nice and considerate, we wait until it’s late enough before we have loud sex, that’s what you should do!” By this point they were both on the ground laughing because this was honestly the most fun that they had had in a long time. And maybe they were going to get in trouble, but it was worth it, it was worth seeing their neighbor in the elevator the next day and all the awkwardness that went with it because he looked like he hadn’t gotten any sleep and it was worth the hangover that they both work up with the next morning. 

–––––––––––––––

Sometimes their friends will mention how domestic they are and they always deny it, but when they really think about it, and they think about all the little things that they do together, they notice that really they have become quite the domestic couple. And Phil thinks that maybe they should have an issue with that, but honestly, there’s no one else that he would rather be domestic with, and he’s pretty sure Dan feels the same way.


End file.
